Humor

I’m All About Debates

You may have read my post about problematic anti-feminist and rapey messages in some current pop music. If not, you should check it out. I decided to take a stab at satirizing one of those songs with a Grounded Parents approved message. A music video may be in the works.

 

 

All About Debates

Because you know
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates

Yeah, it’s pretty clear, I ain’t no Food Babe fool
But I can prove it, prove it
Like I’m supposed to do
‘Cause I got that research that all the people need
And all the right studies in peer reviewed journals

I see Mercola pushing homeopathy drops
We know that shit ain’t real
C’mon now, make it stop
If you got common sense, just raise ’em up
‘Cause every inch of you is science
From the bottom to the top

Yeah, my mama she told me don’t worry about a man
She says, “Study hard and there’s nothing that you can’t understand.”
You know I won’t be a fearmonger, woo-pushing Barbie doll
So if that’s what you’re into then go ahead and move along

Because you know I’m
All about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates
Hey!

I’m bringing science back
Go ahead and tell the Food Babe Army that
No I’m just playing. I know you like your tin foil hat
But I’m here to tell ya
Every inch of you is science from the bottom to the top

Yeah, my mama she told me don’t worry about a man
She says, “Study hard and there’s nothing that you can’t understand.”
You know I won’t be a fearmonger, woo-pushing Barbie doll
So if that’s what you’re into then go ahead and move along

Because you know I’m
All about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates

Because you know I’m
All about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates

Because you know I’m
All about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates, no trolling
I’m all about debates
‘Bout debates
‘Bout debates, ’bout debates
Hey, hey, ooh
You know you like my science

Image and song credit: Steph, All Rights Reserved

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Steph

Steph is a mom, stepmom, freelance writer, and advocate. When she's not busy writing, chasing kids around, cleaning up messes, and trying to change the world, Steph enjoys snuggling, making pies, politics, reading paranormal fiction, yoga, and fitness. A fully recovered natural parent, Steph now trusts science, evidence, and common sense to lead the way. She has been actively involved in the reproductive and women's rights movements for more than 20 years and is a passionate pro-choice feminist. Her writing can be found on Grounded Parents, Romper, The Cut, and other print and online publications

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